Thursday, October 8, 2015

An Open Letter to the Devoutly Religious and Oh So Put-Upon Christians

Dear Evangelical, Born Again, Dominionist, snake handling, tongue talking, gun wielding, gay hating, misogynistic,  xenophobic, bible deficient, cherry picking Christians of all sects and denominations:

Hola!!  Hope you are well.  I’m doing fine in spite of your penchant for praying Psalm 109 imprecatory prayer every day in the hopes of bringing about the deaths of atheists, scientists, liberals, gays, the President, Muslims, pagans, and freethinkers everywhere.

Listen, I'm just dropping you this note to let you know you have my support.  I fully endorse your kids praying in school.  They can pray in their seats silently, so as not to disturb others.  They can pray in the bathroom while relieving themselves or while sneaking a smoke. They can pray on the playground, or during test taking, and in the lunch room, and on the bus to and from school, just so long as it is silent and doesn’t disrupt the class and/or school sponsored activities, isn’t proselytizing/forcing it on others, and isn’t being lead or endorsed by a teacher or any person hired by the school system. 

I’m quite sure your man-god can hear the silent prayers of your children…what with his being omniscient and telepathic and all.  Besides, Jesus said one should pray silently, and out of the public eye so as not to be a flaming hypocrite about ones devoutness (Matthew 6: 5-6).  But you knew that, right? Right.

I also wanted to say I support your anti-gay perspective.  Yep, the bible said homosexuals are an abomination and should be killed.  I don’t know how far you’re willing to go with that - considering you have zero interest in observing the other 612 laws of the Torah / Old Testament - but I encourage you to forego the murder of gays and simply hate them. Yes, that’s right, I fully endorse your right to hate gays, to not marry a gay person, or go to their weddings, or give them presents, or partake in their traditionally “fabulous” wedding receptions. You don’t have to invite them over for parties or prayer meetings, nor to your child’s ritualistic dunking or lamb’s blood washing. 

It’s totally okay to despise gays, including that 10% who, statistically,  are your sons and daughters even if you don’t know it yet.  It’s all good just so long as in conducting commerce with the public you treat gay people like you do straight people; and in conducting government business while in the employ of the government, you similarly make no distinctions. No doubt your God will understand, give you a pass, (he did say “render unto Caesar what is Caesar’s” after all) and will simply condemn homos to hell and eternal torture in due time. It’s all good.

Next…I fully understand your “Right to Life” position, although it is a tad peculiar how your compassion and respect for the sanctity of human life doesn’t extend to death row inmates you so eagerly want to see hanged, gassed, shot or injected with a fatal cocktail…never mind the calls by some of your most devout to shoot, burn, lynch and otherwise murder our president.

Nevertheless, I support your right to not have an abortion, not conduct an abortion, not to pay for an abortion, not to watch abortions being conducted.  But your rights, your religious convictions, are sacrosanct right up to where they begin to impede and truncate the rights of women who do not hold your view and who are exercising their right to an abortion as determined by the Supreme Court over forty years ago in Roe v. Wade, 1973.  That is where your right of religious conviction stops and no longer holds sway over anyone’s reproductive systems … other than your own and your minor children.  

Finally, and this one is really important to remember: you can say Merry Christmas all you like. You can call them Christmas trees, Christmas decorations, Christmas presents, and Christmas vacations until you shit an Elf on the Shelf.  But the fact is, Christians do not own the month of December. It belongs to everyone including those who observe other religious holidays that fall during that time period, or who only observe New Years, or who observe no holidays at all who don’t feel like saying Merry Christmas, or opt not to  celebrate it like you do.  If people saying “Happy Holidays” offends you then shove some tinsel in your ear and buck up… this fallacious  persecution complex and make believe war on Christmas that you,
Bill “The Tide Goes In” O’Reilly,  and your 76% Xtian majority sob about annually is bullshit and doesn’t fool anyone.    Really want to be a martyr for Christianity?  Then visit the Big Cat House at your local zoo, and see if you can scratch a few lion bellies.  

In closing: I trust my support of your oh so important agendas, beliefs and prejudices is a comfort to you.  You’ll be even happier to hear that most freethinkers, realists and atheists similarly share my support for your freedom to embrace your stunted, medieval, cloistered, hateful non-think.  And as you practice your beliefs just remember, speaking on behalf of every American atheist …when we are the majority, we promise to treat you better than you treated us. Promise!

Yours in reason,

Dromedary Hump


Thursday, October 1, 2015

Silentium Est Aureum [Silence is golden] ... sometimes.

I was waiting in line at the registrar's desk at my doctor's office today, when a a short woman perhaps in her fifties was exiting the office. She came up to me, smiled, said hello as though we knew each other. "I see by your fatigue shirt you were in the military." she said.

"Well, yes....a long, long time ago...Vietnam." I replied - realizing I had thrown on a camouflage shirt with my army unit patches and insignia on it as an over shirt for the first chilly day of the season.
She took my hand squeezed it looked into my eyes and said "Well, I want to thank you so much for what you did for us ... may God bless you and keep you." And as quickly as she appeared she exited.

It was so sudden, and I was so off guard, that I couldn't even respond with anything more than a weak "thanks." ... which is probably a good thing.

Because if my once razor sharp reflexes, now dulled by sixty-seven years of longevity, .had the time to kick in I may have told her I did nothing for her, or this country; that no thanks were due me; that  if I had the maturity, intellect and and common sense back then that I have now  I'd not have volunteered for the draft and would be a Canadian citizen enjoying a fully paid for annual physical as well as free dental;  ... not to mention the fact there is no fuckin' God, and if there was I'd hold the damnable thing responsible for the 58,220 dead American boys and girls who died there for nothing.

Just as well it happened too fast. She wouldn't have deserved that.

Friday, September 25, 2015

A Believer's Inquiry Part II: Of Gnomes and Gods

The following is the second of two email exchanges between myself and believer author Dick Gist.  Once again, if I am not appropriately representing your position/s as freethinkers, or even if I am, please feel free to comment on the blog article by clicking on "comments" at the end of this article on my blog,  or via this link    Thanks!


Over the years I’ve “buried" a number of inadequate gods, and each experience was one of doubt and pain and sadness. But each time, a greater god appeared. I’m curious. In order to reject or deny a god, one must have in mind that which he/she is rejecting, and it would be interesting to know what that is for people (just a suggestion). I have to tell you, I don’t get enough stimulation of the sort I get from you, so I really appreciate your input.

The best,

I'm a little at a loss as to your experience with "inadequate gods" and how atheists might relate to it vis-a-vis understanding which god one is rejecting.  It may be owing to the possibility that you are too invested in the "Everyone must have 'something' to believe in!" mindset that most theists seem to have, and seem to be unable to get beyond. But here's my best attempt at answering your question: 

As an atheist the very concept of a god has as much meaning to me as the concept of gnomes has to you.  You reject gnomes at face as not real, a non-existent creature, a creation of man's mind.  You do not need to substitute your rejection of gnomes with some other mythical creature; nor do you have to analyze what gnome qualities you reject.  I'd bet dollars to donuts it's not even a consideration.

Similarly, atheists' view God/gods of any flavor; with any  attributes or temperament; from any culture, time period, or civilization;  as just one more "gnome".  We don't need to find some replacement. 

In lieu of dependence on / belief in supernatural beings, most atheists tend to invest their lives in scientific reality, reason; in family and friends; in education, civility, fairness, and justice; in empathy for those less fortunate and the ethic of reciprocity; trying to make the here and now in the only world we will ever know as good as it can be.   No boogieman, or man-god, or four armed elephant god need apply. 

This is often difficult for the religiously indoctrinated to wrap their arms around, an alien concept, their having known nothing else but supernaturalism. 

Alas, while belief in gnomes is harmless, belief in supreme beings and the expectations and requirements they are  perceived to demand from their followers and practitioners is often quite malevolent and destructive. That is what makes me an anti-theist as well as an atheist.

Anyway... I'll work this aspect of our exchange into a second blog, and invite my readers to add their own perspectives.  We have no doctrine or dogma, so  I'm speaking for myself and from info gleaned from my association with many non-believers over the years.

Yours in reason,


Friday, September 18, 2015

A Believer's Inquiry Part 1: Of Gods and Aliens. Your Participation Requested.

Occasionally I receive emails from believers asking my perspective on religious matters / matters of belief. I try to be has helpful as possible to aid them in understanding the atheist perspective.  The other day I received one from a believer and fellow author, Dick Gist.  We have exchanged two email discussions thus far. This is Part 1 of a two part discussion. 

I am posting our exchange here to solicit your active input as to whether or not my answers represent my readers' positions. Since atheists do not share anything in common except having no belief in God or gods, I am always cautious in providing input that may be mistaken for "doctrine" or "dogma", since we have no such thing. I'm hoping you will share your thoughts, objections, agreements, alternative views so as to give Dick (and I) greater insights to atheist thought.

PLEASE, share your input on my blog page by clicking on "COMMENTS" located at the end of this article on my blog site. Or by clicking on the following link (or copying and pasting it into your address bar) which will take you to this article's comments page. It would be greatly appreciated by Dick and I.  Thanks in advance.

Hello Bart,

Dick Gist here "You don’t understand the Bible because you are Christian" is my most current book.  I have a question I hope you might respond to. And as I ask I realize there probably is no one answer. When an atheist says he/she does not believe in God, does that mean the theistic god of Judaism and Christianity (a lot of we believers reject that one), or does it mean an atheist believes we are alone in the universe? I’m reminded of Buckminster Fuller’s words, “Sometimes I think we are alone. Sometimes I think we’re not. Either way the thought is staggering.”

Busy here, and enjoying periodic give and take with the fundamentalist element, one a relative who recently grieved that I’m on my way into eternal darkness. Almost enough to tempt one towards atheism.

Hope you are well. I suspect the colors might be beginning to change there.

Dick Gist

 Hi Dick,

So nice to hear from you.  I am familiar with your book and have read some excerpts. Nicely done.  Having read the Bible more than once myself, the KJV and NIV, and after years of debate with Christians, your premise that they don't understand the Bible because of its Jewish roots is dead on.  In fact, very few have even opened its cover,  by my experience. 

To your question:  I 'd say there is one answer, and it's relatively simple - atheists do not have belief in ANY God or gods, period.  I'm comfortable speaking for atheists when I say we take all gods to have been inventions of man - made in man's image, one might say - with all of man's most malevolent attributes (i.e. jealousy, anger, hostility, vengeance, barbarism)  and some of the good ones too...albeit with an even more intense level than the emotions and attributes of man... supercharged so to speak.

I have also yet to meet an atheist who does not totally dismiss the supernatural as well as God/gods, although nothing in the definition of atheist / atheism prohibits one from believing in ghosts, faeries, demons and leprechauns, et al, aside from one's common sense and innate skepticism. 

As for being alone in the universe I can only speak for myself and most atheists I know.  It is highly unlikely, in my opinion, for earth to be the lone planet to sustain life among the billions and billions of planets in the vastness of the universe.  The very fact that earth supports life is evidence that life can exist elsewhere, given similar conditions. Thus, no...we are not alone, in my opinion. [Note: this is much different than believers in God / gods, who believe God/gods exist based solely on faith, with no observable evidence or supporting examples.]  Whether that life / life form is more or less advanced than us is any ones guess.  

Hope that answers your question.  If you do decide to "come to the dark side" as we freethinkers like to joke, be sure to let me know so I can be among the first to congratulate you on your final stage of evolution toward modernity.

Yours in reason,


Bart Centre
AKA Dromedary Hump, "The Atheist Camel"

Friday, September 11, 2015


Fourteen years ago today my eldest son experienced first hand the horror of the 911 attack. That morning he escaped World Trade Center Tower II as his mom and I waited for hours to know if he was alive or dead.  Almost three-thousand other Americans, and their tens of thousands of family and friends who loved them, were not so lucky.

For as long as my son, my wife and I live, that day will be indelibly etched into our memories.

No prayers for the fallen; no accolades to an imaginary being for sparing our son's life while said fantasy being allowed thousands to die in agony and fear.  No.  Just sadness at our nation's losses, and anguish at the suffering made possible by religious fanaticism. 

 'Science flies men to the moon, religion flies men into buildings.'  -Victor Stenger

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

“All Glory goes to God.” : The Ultimate Delusion of the Religiously Afflicted.

After four and a half days in jail for contempt of court, the Kentucky county clerk religious fanatic who refused to issue gay marriage licenses because of her religious convictions has been released.  .

The faithful were jubilant as she emerged from the jail; waving cutout crosses, signs with religious verse, and of course, the obligatory Confederate battle flag.  Because nothing says freedom, support for justice, and equal rights under the law like the Confederate flag.

Sandwiched between Mike Huckabee, the Al Sharpton of the right; her lawyer from Liberty University, a school that makes an associates degree from a third rate community college look like a doctorate; and her husband, the ultimate caricature of the white Southern under-educated trailer dwelling redneck dressed in his overalls and a straw hat … the three time divorcee and protector of family values and the faith proclaimed “All glory goes to God.”

To paraphrase Saturday Night Live’s Dan Akroid: “No, Kim…you ignorant slut…all glory goes to the reason and sanctity of a secular judicial system.”  The judge released her with the understanding that she will not interfere with her deputy clerks issuing marriage licenses to any qualified applicants including gay couples.

But never mind reality - Jesus set her free. For you see she serves “a living God” who, quite coincidentally, hates gays as much as she does, but who also it seems telepathically told her it’s cool to eat shrimp, marry four times, and wear her tacky polyester/cotton blend garments… never mind the biblical  admonishments against those things.

If there was ever a reason to despise the South and Christian fanatics it was the scene outside that jail - a veritable orgy of religious delusion and religiously supported bigotry. I sense this will embolden other office holders to misinterpret the judges reasoning and  largess and test the waters by similarly defying the law of the land. 

But it is of no matter. Gays will now be legally married, even in that Kentucky county. The protestations, and hallelujahs, praises and appeals to their god thing will not stop the advancement of freedom and equality, and the evolution of civility…anymore than did their for-bearers’ invoking the bible as justification for segregation and opposition to mixed marriage.  And as annoying and grotesquely laughable as that jail house celebration was, in the end, that’s all that matters.

{ Note:  My thanks to those of you who emailed me asking about my absence and expressing concerns for my health.  I’m well rested and eager to resume sharing my perspectives on religion.  Thank you all for your patience and continued support. - Hump}

Saturday, May 2, 2015

Professor Hump’s Three Minute Quiz:'s Pass / Fail

Quiz time, ladies and gentlemen.  Please put your books under your desk,  keep your eyes on your own computer, and no talking to your neighbor. You’ll have three minutes to complete this quiz.  Ready?  Let’s go:
Question 1:  The following are actual head lines taken directly from internet news sites. What two things, besides homophobia, do all of the people referenced in the body of these articles have in common?

 -  Alan Keyes: Gay Marriage Ruling A 'Just Cause For War'

-  Rick Wiles Warns Of 'Fireball From Space' If Supreme Court Strikes
    Down Gay Marriage Bans

-  Pastor Hagee: Putting an end to Gay Marriage is 'A Matter of Survival'

-  Rick Santorum Warns Gay Marriage Could Lead to Christian Persecution

 -  Texas lawmaker: ‘What is going on in Baltimore’ is because of too 
     many gay marriages

-  Church Marquee in Georgia Calls For Death To All Gay People

-  Pastor calls for killing gays to end AIDS

-  California’s ‘Kill The Gays’ Initiative Sparks Outrage
-  Mike Huckabee: Justices Can't Overrule God On Gay Marriage

Answer:  if you said “**Fundie Christian” and “Republican (GOP)” give yourself 10 points for each of the two possible answers. 
(**If you said simply “Christian” give yourself  ½ credit = 5 points)

Question 2: Given the inherent and well documented bigotry, social regression, and mindless hate that pervade these two groups, compounded by their traditional misogyny, obsession with your genitalia / sexuality, racism, distrust / denial of science, theocratic mindset, and jingoistic war endorsement -  if they were your neighbors would you align yourself with them by voting for them for mayor, or selectman, or town council, or dog catcher, much less a higher office?

Answer: if you said “No!” or / “Hell No!!” give yourself 10 points.    

Question 3:  Are you a registered Republican and/or an Independent who votes GOP?  If yes: how in the name of reason, modernity and humanity do you live with yourself being aligned with these people?

Answer: if you said “NO” give yourself 20 points.
If you answered “YES” and justified your position with “smaller government, and/or bigger defense spending, and/or  because blacks don’t vote GOP, and/ or lower taxes for the rich” deduct 30 points and unsubscribe to this blog at the bottom of your email notice.  Our common atheism is insufficient to justify our continued relationship.   

Okay pencils down.
If you got 40-50 points congrats, you pass! Proud of you.
If your score is 30 points or less, you fail … why are you still here?